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So you're a virgin. That sucks, doesn't it!

Believe me, I understand the frustration of doing everything that you think you should be doing to finally get out of the friend zone, connect with a girl you like, and actually have sex. I have been there and lived with that monotonous frustration of sex eluding me no matter what I tried.

Why you must master your mind, committed man.

There's this misguided romantic notion of a man at war with himself  -  a man who finds himself often in the cratered and barbwire-strewn no man's land between high-minded principles, commitments made, and his impulses and baser drives. Our culture sees fit to elevate these men to great heights  -  think of the latest celebrity or politician to get caught in some sordid affair that totally undermines something they latterly espoused with great certainty to raucous applause.

But, this article is not about the endemic betrayal and duplicity of our leaders and icons  -  it's about risk mitigation in your most important relationship, committed man. It's about choosing the ounce of prevention every day instead of desperately needing a ton of cure one day. It's about making damn sure that you don't get a torpedo shot down your most vulnerable thermal exhaust port. When it comes to your monogamous commitment to your woman, be master and supreme commander of your mind, not an indecisive general manager that allows the bushfires of revolution to spread.

Yes, I've had my dick burned by scalding laser pinpricks over and over again for about 20 minutes...

"Why the hell did you subject yourself to that," you ask. Well, it was a surgery I had to undergo because I forgot something very noble and kingly that I once believed, was sold and lived a lie for about a decade - a lie that you might be really bought into, as I was. Is a laser-powered penis-cauterizing session in your future? That's up to you!

Yes, really.
You've heard that clubs are awful as places to meet women - that you can only meet sluts and party girls - "blenders" - at clubs. And there’s some truth to this stereotype but I met my wife, who was the furthest thing from promiscuous and who is objectively a better wife than any other I’ve ever heard of, at a club. And I'll tell you a little about how we met and what stood out about her, but as you can see I am in a beautiful place - Sozopol on Bulgaria's black sea coast...

This is kind of a special place for me - it's where my now wife and I took our first romantic getaway as a couple 4 years ago. And walking these cobbled streets again inspires me to share some lessons about frame control - which is super important in your relationships. Frame control is worth figuring out, if you're mindful of frame control and get it right from the inception of your relationship with a lady, the reward is tranquility.

2023 Update: I'm proud to report that our sex life is better now after a half-decade of marriage. On a fairly regular basis, we will still have spontaneous sex in the middle of the day just because we feel like it! We got married a little fast, we didn't date for years before marrying. And I really don't regret it, I regard it as the best decision I've ever made.

I got married. I'll explain why I took this very calculated risk...

Thanksgiving (a very special holiday for me) of 2018, I got married. My life has been a (mostly intentional) dance with risk, sometimes a reggaeton-powered bump'n grind, sometimes a rhythmic salsa step. In that adventurous spirit, I'm now embracing something new...

Marriage is risky, especially for men. If you don't know why I'll encourage you to just spend a little time perusing the MGTOW corner of YouTube. I certainly don't completely agree with these guys but there's an abundance of evidence why marriage is very risky, indeed the ultimate risk a modern man can take.

Jonathan and Gergana, they're a husband and wife
Whose advice on love is sound and advice is rife.
They've been together for half a decade or more,
And they've seen it all, from the good to the bad and the sore.

Their advice is always sound,
And never fails to cool
The ardor of the love-sick youth,
And make him see the truth.

But be warned, their advice can be a bit blunt,
So if you're easily offended, you might want to run.
But if you're looking for honest and straight-talking advice,
Then J&G are the ones to go to, no price.

In these webisodes, we dispense tips, tricks, and relationshackingtechniques for those longing for belonging and relationships that are sinking ships...

"My wife is getting fat! What the heck should I do...?" 💔 J&G Relationships Q&A #1

Book Review: Integrate the shadow of your masculinity before it drags you to hell

Lately, I've been listening to a lot of masculinity podcasts. One of them that doesn't suck is ManTalks with Connor Beaton. So I dove into his personal growth book for men, which also doesn't suck! It really lives up to the second word of its subtitle, A Practical Guide to Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, and Find Freedom. The book is about a topic I've long shied away from (for some reason)...

Gents, one of the most pernicious myths about women that I’d like to disabuse you of is that women are just into guys with money.

Few men (or women) will experience, either in intensity or frequency, sex that powerfully infuses the rest of their life with zest and vigor.

I'm a man with significant breadth and depth of sexual experiences, thus this article is mostly for menbut I include some biohacks and supplements that I'm confident (either because of scientific research, meaningful anecdotal data, or first-hand experience) will improve a woman's experience of sex. I'm hoping that one-day virtual reality comes up with a way for me to experience sex as a woman, which is a weird thing for a straight male to write, I'm sure it will be an even weirder experience!

The Inevitable Uncondoming…

Single guys, if you implement some (or all) of the sex hacks described here you're going to be having some very hot, passionate sex which tends to lead to unprotected sex. In my new book, Don’t Stick Your Dick in a Blender, I have a chapter, The Inevitable Uncondoming (which you can download here for free and read at your leisure), all about unprotected sex. Please, don’t underestimate how easy it is to royally screw up your life by inviting the wrong kinds of women into your bed. Good, yet naive, men routinely wreck their lives because they “stick their dick in a blender” — having sex with the wrong kinds of women. STDs, unplanned pregnancies, false accusations, mental health headcases, and divorce make chasing skirts a dangerous game. This book delves deeply into advanced social dynamics strategies and lifehacks for meeting and seducing a woman worthy of your uncondomed cock.

Book Review: Why you shouldn't tell her "You're beautiful!" every day 

We all know that you need to make an ongoing effort to keep the romantic flame alive in a relationship, that's why you tell your woman "You're beautiful!" on the regular, right? "Open Her" by Karen Brody explains why this quotidian romantic overture falls far short of making your lady feel seen, loved, and desired. The author is sort of like a female Roosh V (a comparison I'm sure she would just love). She tasted the rainbow of masculinity and defines seven masculine archetypes in this book - which isn't really "red-pilled", feminist, or anti-feminist. This book and its unique insights on men and women don't really fit into one of our modern culture war camps. My witty and pretty wife and I read this one together, and share takeaways in this podcast...

As a nomadic seducer, in Sofia, I got laid more, got paid more, established better friendships, and left with more good memories and lessons learned than the previous cities I spent equal time in.

As opposed to crediting this to Sofia itself (herself?) or some unquantifiable metaphysical influence or self-help principle, I know exactly why my time there was so productive in all the dimensions that are important to me. I No Fapped and No Boozed the majority of my time there, I completed 30 Days of No Fap and 90 Days of No Booze. abstaining from these two vices simultaneously really is a synergistic lifehack for productivity and happiness. For a man, these two habits really are symbiotic; when I’m No Fapping I’m way more motivated to go out, make friends and meet girls but No Fapping for this long requires serious discipline that is all but impossible if you are even a moderate social drinker.

Gents, a WILD story about a husband and father who got royally screwed by his wife and ended up imprisoned...

They were Australians, their country was subjected to some of the harshest COVID lockdowns. Australians had virtually no freedom of movement rights at this time. People weren't allowed to go to their jobs. People weren't allowed to visit family. Small businesses were crushed. It was pretty bad. And this Aussie wasn't happy about all this - presumably, he was resistant to mandatory vaccination and being told he had to wear a face mask while walking alone outside in broad daylight. He wasn't like an activist, protestor, or journalist causing problems for the draconian Australian state, he was just a guy who wanted his rights back.

He ended up being visited by the police along with "mental health" workers and was detained in a facility because he disagreed with his wife on COVID stuff. He was a "COVID truther" and she was a "COVID mainstreamer" - and apparently she reported his dissenting opinions, through her "healthcare" employer, to the authorities. He was detained and subjected to a mental health assessment for his thoughtcrime.When he is released I can just imagine the tense, sex-less bedroom and domestic discord in his locked-down household!

Setting aside the staggering injustice of a man being imprisoned and accused of insanity just for disagreeing with the mainstream narrative, what a striking and grievous betrayal by his wife! You might think that during a time of such stress and uncertainty - being locked in your home by your government - she would have simply agreed to disagree. Let him think what he wants about COVID and try to just focus on being a cohesive co-parenting team. But, no, her television told her those wrong thinkers must be reported to authorities so that's what she did.

Book Review: Cunnilingus is for pussies!

Being a Tantric husband, a cunning linguist myself, and ever curious about new things to add more spice to the Roseland bedroom, I picked up this book - the book on cunnilingus. And while it's well-written and informative, it left an unfavorable taste in my mouth.

I've never been very enthusiastic about cunnilingus, I thought, maybe it's one of those things (like salsa dancing) that I'd enjoy if I actually got good at it. The book does present a very thorough guide (and I'll synopsize some of the best stuff here), but it does so in a way that myself and many (non-feminist) men will find downright unpalatable. Consider the author's Cunnilinguist Manifesto...

“To her according to your abilities, from you according to her needs.”

Inspired, of course, by the Communist Manifesto, “From each according to their abilities, to each according to their needs.” As a right-thinking man, I FUCKING HATE communism - communists murdered my Bulgarian wife's grandfather in cold blood - so we're not off to a great start. My aversion to cunnilingus is probably due to it feeling submissive, the same reason that women really seem to enjoy giving fellatio. I don't look down on men who love performing cunnilingus (well, I would if I were in the same room as them while they were doing it), but it was a monumental blunder on behalf of the author to cram a lot of his feminist inversion agenda ideology into a guide to something that men naturally feel just a little uneasy about.

Book Review: "Orgasmic Meditation" a sex hack for the attentive

In my curiosity about all things sex hacking, I came across this video on YouTube, there is a man and a woman, the woman removes her pants, lies down, and the man puts on a rubber glove and proceeds to give her a stroke job. Turns out this is called OM (orgasmic meditation), it's a way to slow down sex and enhance intimacy. The evangelist of OM is this woman Nicole Daedone, I watched a few of her presentations and couldn't quite decide if she was a hedonistic postmodern feminist or a profound thinker, so I read her book Slow Sex: The Art and Craft of the Female Orgasm. My wife and I tried OMing with mixed results, we discuss the book in this podcast. Listen up and stroke slowly, gents...

No Fap for men is an unbeatable Biohack for motivation, energy, aggression, and improving overall mood.

A lot of guys' issue with social anxiety is that they lack social motivation. After a long day or week of work, they just cannot be bothered to go out.

Or perhaps, if you're like a lot of guys I talk to, you would be motivated to go out and practice your social skills if you knew you were going to be connecting with intellectual equals. If you knew you were going to go out and meet people with who you could have stimulating conversations, to who you were attracted, you would actually go to the trouble of getting out of the house. When you do go out and socialize you often find yourself bored by the quality (or virtual lack) of (coherent) conversation. It seems like you have to get so far outside of your comfort zone to meet people who seem like they are barely a few IQ points north of being retarded. Why even bother?

This is a bit of a catch-22 because to connect with the people you want to; people that turn you on in one way or another, you are going to need to develop your social skills. Right now, if we are honest, your social skills are probably not up to par to connect meaningfully with these people.

My girl and I were enjoying one of the first days of a well-earned week of vacation at the sun-drenched Black Sea seaside. Damn near everything was downright paradisiacal until (as you do) we got into a little argument...

Here’s the crux of the argument: Being on vacation, you’re inclined to take a lot of photos of yourselves looking fabulous and enjoying the colorful environs you find yourself in, and my girl was a bit upset that I wasn’t uploading more photos to social media of us looking like a cute couple as she was doing. Most of the photos I was uploading were just of me looking adventuresome and generally being museful in nature.

Gents, if you’re imagining that one day you might settle down with or marry a beautiful, feminine, family-minded foreign woman, understand that the curtain is being drawn on the opportunity to geo-arbitrage your sexual market value as a Western man in a poorer country.

It’s rough out there for a single guy trying to meet a not-awful attractive girl, I know what you’re going through.

You are either...
Sick and tired of wasting your time trying to meet girls online or in the real world who are astoundingly flakey and hard to actually get out on a date. You seem damned to flounder in the friendzone where nobody wants to touch your dick.
Or
Actively dating, but the girls are so monotonously predictable in their shallowness, smartphone addiction, and their general lack of putting in an effort toward having some semblance of a new relationship.
Or
Disappointed by the shoddy quality of the options you have. The girls you could date are just not attractive or feminine enough to get you really excited.

Whatever the case is for you, you’re growing cynical about women. The reward is just so minuscule for the effort you put into dating or trying to date women.

In one of the more entertaining chapters of my book for men, Don't Stick Your Dick in a Blender, I write about the bad women I've dated hoping to disabuse men learning game of the misguided notion that they should date and try to seduce any woman that they find attractive. I'll share another racy and illustrative episode from my ignoble dating history...

There's a lifehacking/Biohacking domain that's been perhaps more rewarding for me than any other.

It's consistently made my life better and better for over a decade now. It's a topic I've researched and self-experimented with exhaustively, enjoying surprising benefits as I learned, self-experimented, and habituated more. And of course, it's a topic I've done a fair amount of writing and content about. But I'm demotivated and I think I'm done spreading the good news about this topic.